Let’s abolish the mid-life crisis

Isn’t it funny, the number of ways you can go about making your living? My brother, a bit of a petrol head, follows this chap on YouTube who just makes videos of fancy cars driving ’round London. He doesn’t own these cars you understand, he just makes a snappy little video of a snazzy car driving about, says some (presumably – I don’t watch this rubbish) witty stuff, and, just in a few years, he’s become a millionaire (or stupidly rich at least, apparently he’s just bought a Lamborghini).

My brother himself makes his living watching the dregs of Netflix. Well, not quite, but he goes out of his way to find the worst movies he can find, and watches these atrocities of film whilst painting tiny models of monsters and other such creatures and their magical craft. He’s got a little studio in my mum’s garage (yes, he’s a 32-year-old living with his mother).

Another example, my step-sister Joy, she makes sculptures out of paper. They’re not just any sculptures you understand, but probably the best paper sculptures you can buy.

I wouldn't want a job involving bikes. I always fall off them. I'm good at staring into forest canopies though. I might whack that on my CV.
I wouldn’t want a job involving bikes. I always fall off them. I’m good at staring into forest canopies though. I might whack that on my CV.

I’m mentioning all of this because I’m finding my head opening up to new ways of making money. I was terribly miserable wearing a black and white wardrobe and working in a monotone environment where plants and souls went to die (I wrote a lengthy and rant-filled post on this a little while ago, which I thought was brilliant, but someone pointed out that future employers might think otherwise…). But now I’m finding my days are spent selling my skills online, bidding for brand promo work (which is a bit shit but they pay rather well) and working on my exciting new business venture (all will be revealed in good time, lovely readers).

Isn’t it funny that we’re brought up (for the most part) to go to university and get a good measure of debt before we start anything of note; get a job working 9-5 Monday to Friday in something we obviously hate a bit but which we just have to put up with ’cause that’s what people do; find a mate and marry and multiply; buy a snazzy car when we’re in our late 40s to deal with the horrendous inadequacies of our lives; retire and go on plenty of cruises; spend all of our children’s inheritance money on our grandkids so that they might not be in as much debt as we still are due to our student loan; die? That’s just the way o’the world folks, just shut up and comply.

It isn’t like that, of course, but it’s peculiar that so many of us have this drilled into us from so young. I’m no exception. It’s taken a lot of re-teaching on my part to realise that there’s more to life.

Anyway, what am I on about? I’m a packet and a half of chocolate raisins in, no wonder I’m going mental. It’s time to party – someone get me a glass of milk.

Till next time folks.

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